Sex in the Farmyard

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Sex in the Farmyard

Postby bill » Fri Jul 06, 2007 7:13 pm

By ROBIN PERRIE
The Sun.July 06, 2007

Police rushed to a farm to put a kinky teenager udder arrest — after he was seen romping with a COW.

A shocked passer-by rang 999 after seeing the youth — wearing only black briefs — having sex with the steer at 4.30am.

By the time officers arrived he had fled but night-time patrols are on the alert in case he strikes again.

Farmer Richard Parish was stunned to hear what had happened to the cow, one of three rare English longhorns in the field.

Specialist breeder Richard, 39, even thinks he knows which of them was the victim — a looker named Blondie who is the friendliest.

He said: “English longhorns are lovely animals — but not that lovely. My mates are having a right laugh and milking it for all it is worth.”

The teenager was scared off when the passer-by shouted at him at Richard’s farm in Skipwith, North Yorks. Locals in the tiny village, which has a population of less than 300, are certain he was not from the area.

Richard thinks the attacker may even have “wooed” Blondie with grub because a feed bucket had mysteriously moved from time to time.

He added: “I have got to be much more vigilant. The cows don’t seem to be spending so much time outside and are happier inside the barn at night.”

Fellow farmer Alan Patrick said: “I can’t believe it.”

Police said: “We are treating this matter seriously.”


Puts me in mind of the Doris Day movie...Moooooooooooooove over Darling :lol: :lol: :lol:


Any comment fae you 4th Gen??
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Postby 4th gen Suthen' » Fri Jul 06, 2007 7:53 pm

Well, I never!! oh MY!!
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Postby Bobbie En Tejas » Sat Jul 07, 2007 3:49 am

The boy's got problems... he was having sex with a steer???
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Postby jester and the fool » Sat Jul 07, 2007 7:43 am

And what was he standing on when he lifted the tail out the way!!!! :shock: :?
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Postby 4th gen Suthen' » Sat Jul 07, 2007 7:53 am

certainly not the moral high ground!
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Postby Bobbie En Tejas » Sat Jul 07, 2007 11:23 am

very good, 4th!
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Postby Annie » Sat Jul 07, 2007 2:56 pm

Probably the empty feed bucket!
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Postby jfine » Sun Jul 08, 2007 5:56 am

I dunno a steer is big and heavy, no? Sounds consensual to me :shock:
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Postby petewick » Sun Jul 08, 2007 2:08 pm

Annie wrote:Probably the empty feed bucket!



Sounds like the voice of experience
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Postby Sheik Yir Erse » Sun Jul 08, 2007 3:02 pm

That's one of those stories that, as you're reading, your mind is saying "Please don't let this person be from Kintyre, PLEASE!"

You're right tho Petewick, there appears to be some inside information on the forum re this kind of activity :lol:
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Postby general jack o'niell » Sun Jul 08, 2007 3:20 pm

this moving the tail out the way and standing on the bucket? how would anyone even know such information? way too knowledgable for my liking, reminds me of carradale fishermen and the mooth of a skate
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Postby bill » Sun Jul 08, 2007 3:49 pm

I thought it might have been a sheep sha**er moving up in the world,taking a fancy to a bit of Aberdeen Agnes

:lol: :lol: :lol:
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Postby general jack o'niell » Sun Jul 08, 2007 4:14 pm

your not allowed to call them that anymore, thats rascist and liable to offend our southend posters.
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Postby bill » Sun Jul 08, 2007 5:22 pm

Sorry, :( ....apoligies to any offended local fermers :o ,especially frae Suthen. 8) who micht ware sunglesses :lol:
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Postby general jack o'niell » Mon Jul 09, 2007 7:46 pm

maybe he cannie get the yow to lean on the windaesill so he can still see into the room to look at his monitor?

sorry, that was a horrible picture, even in my head!!!! oh no, now the yow has sunglasses on, and she is smiling, take it away, take it away!!!!!!
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