Football positions

[Pete Reek]

Yi hear ah theys disskruptions aboot hoot pazeetiun futba pleyurs ur on the park, an it kinna stumps me a wee bit.
Tell me if ahm wrang: Therrs a wee man wae his neck startin aboot six inches up fae is waist, right? Duz he play the pazeetiun o half back? Wan at six fut wid be a full back?
Therrs a thin guy wi hoorafa bright rud herr that makes hum look lake a match: heel be the striker wullunt he?

[A Horse called Juan Face]

oh dear

[sentrano]

[A Horse called Juan Face]

i especially like the way position was spelled
pazeetion

exactly as it sounds