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The Rooster

PostPosted: Sat Mar 15, 2014 12:38 pm
by gray_marian
A Texan poultry farmer had about 500 hens, but no rooster, and he wanted chicks. So he went down the road to the next farmer and asked if he had a rooster that he would sell. The other farmer said " Yep, I"ve got this great rooster named Kenny. He"ll service every chicken youve got, no problem". Kenny the rooster costs 3000 dollars". It was a lot of money but the farmer decided he"d be worth it. So he bought Kenny.The farmer took Kenny home and set him down in the barnyard , but first he gave the rooster a pep talk, " I want you to pace yourself now. You"ve got a lot of chickens to service here, and you cost me a lot of money. Consequently, I'll need you to do a good job. So take your time and have some fun", the farmer said with a chuckle.
Kenny seemed to understand, so the farmer pointed toward the hen house and Kenny took off like a shot. WHAM! Kenny nailed every hen in the hen house three or four times, and the farmer was really shocked. After that the farmer heard a commotion in the duck pen and, sure enough, Kenny is in there. Later the farmer saw Kenny after a flock of geese down by the lake. WHAM! once again he got all the geese.
By sunset he saw Kenny out in the fields chasing quail and pheasants. The farmer was distraught and worried that his expensive rooster wouldn't last 24 hours. Sure enough the farmer went to bed and woke up the next morning to find Kenny on his back out in the middle of the yard, mouth open, tongue hanging out and both feet sticking up in the air.Buzzards were, by now circling overhead.
The farmer saddened by the loss of such a colourful and expensive bird shook his head and said " Oh Kenny I told you to pace yourself, I tried to get you to slow down, now look what you've done to yourself"
Kenny opened one eye, nodded towards the buzzards circling in the sky and said "Shhhh, they're getting closer."

Re: The Rooster

PostPosted: Fri Feb 06, 2015 3:50 pm
by lighterman
https://www.google.co.uk/url?sa=t&sourc ... ES0LreMl2Q

Hilarious.
IIRC the Beeb let him do it on TOTP because nobody at the Beeb knew what "Tup" meant.

Re: The Rooster

PostPosted: Sat Feb 07, 2015 3:42 pm
by gray_marian
Liked this too Lighterman :D

Jake Thackray - Leopold Alcocks - YouTube
Video for Jake Thackray - Leopold Alcocksâ–¶ 4:16â–¶ 4:16
www.youtube.com/watch?v=zWJJ3loRqUA

Re: The Rooster

PostPosted: Sun Feb 08, 2015 12:48 pm
by LANDROVER ROGER
Thank you lighterman and gray_marian.Both brilliant!