The Kintyre Forum

Twin sisters in a nursing home were turning one hundred years old.
The editor of the local rag told the photographer to get over there and take pictures of the two 100 year-old twins.
One of the twins was hard of hearing and the other could hear quite well.
Once the photographer arrived he asked the sisters to sit on the sofa.
The deaf sister said to her twin, "WHAT DID HE SAY?"
"WE GOTTA SIT OVER THERE ON THE SOFA!" said the other.
"Now get a little closer together," said the cameraman.
Again, "WHAT DID HE SAY?"
"HE SAYS, 'SQUEEZE TOGETHER A LITTLE.'" So they wiggled up close to each other.
"Just hold on for a bit longer, I've got to focus a little," said the photographer.
Yet again, "WHAT DID HE SAY?"
"HE SAYS HE'S GONNA FOCUS!"
With a huge, happy grin the deaf twin shouted out, "OH LORDY JESUS! - BOTH OF US?"

Like it, going to "pinch it" for the lads at work.

Glassblower, all mine are 'pinched' feel free....

Thanks, likewise with most of mine.

Same Twins.
Hearing one says "the new vicar seems a nice chap"
Deaf one "the what, dear?"
Hearing one, "the new vicar seems nice, but he has an awfully loud voice for in church"
Deaf one, "he has what, dear?"
Hearing one, "he has an extremely loud voice. Balls like a bull!"
Deaf one, "has he, dear. I didn't notice!"

All good!