The Budget (Adult content)

by **Martin** » Sun Jun 12, 2011 7:09 pm

I found the original and an updated version.
I will try to clean it up as much as possible. If the admin think it's too far and want to delete ? If it's beyond limits I'll apologise in advance.

The country was in such a terrible state,
Then the Commons arose for a Budget debate,
It was quite a few minutes before Healey spoke,
And then he said, "SEX will cost one quid a poke"

Whether you're short, little, long, fat or thick,
The tax will be paid on the use of your d**k,
Then Jeremy Thorpe said, "now look Dennis dear,
Will this tax apply to the boys who are queer?"

Then Ted Heath arose and looked rather glum,
"Will I be exempted --I only like bum?"
Mr. Healey replied and he sounded quite airy,
"The tax will be doubled for you, you old fairy."

Mr. Foot then arose to tremendous applause,
He grabbed Margaret Thatcher and ripped off her drawers,
He straddled across her and rode her at will,
Then shouted at Dennis, "Put that on my bill!"

Mr. Wilson then shouted, "I think I'll resign,
I haven't had sex for a very long time,
I dream every night of a f***y that's hairy,
But I get not response from my darling Mary."

The debate carried on, oh my what a sight,
David Owen was w***ing the whole of the night,
The speaker then said, "Let the voters decide,
But I think they'll all settle for one quid a ride."

So now in the bedrooms of Britain at night,
There's many a f***y that's closed good and tight,
We're taxed on our booze and we're taxed on our smoking,
But we didn't expect to be taxed when we're poking.

If one quid a grind is the price we must pay,
The answer is this, with ourselves we must play,
To quench our frustration we now have to w**k,
And for the state of the country we've got Healey to thank.

The Budget

The country was in such a terrible state,
When the Commons arose for a Budget debate,
It was quite a few minutes before the Chancellor spoke,
And he said, "Sex will now cost one pound a poke."

"Whether you're short, little, long, fat or thick,
This tax will be paid on the use of your d**k."
Then Peter Mandelson said, "Look Alaistair dear,
Will this tax apply to the boys who are queer?"

Mark Oaten arose and looked rather glum,
"Will I be exempted - I prefer bum?"
Mr Darling replied and he sounded quite airy,
"The tax will be doubled for you, you old fairy."

Mr Cameron arose to tremendous applause,
He grabbed Harriet Harman and ripped off her drawers,
He straddled across her and rode her at will,
Then shouted at Darling, "Put that on my bill!"

Mr Brown then shouted, "I think I'll resign,
I haven't had sex for a very long time,
I dream every night of a f***y that's hairy,
But I get no response from my darling Sarah."

The debate carried on, oh my what a sight,
Boris Johnson was w***ing the whole of the night,
The speaker then said "Let the voters decide,
But I think they'll all settle for one quid a ride."

So now in the bedrooms of Britain at night,
There's many a f***y that's closed good and tight,
We're taxed on our booze and we're taxed on our smoking,
But we didn't expect to be taxed when we're poking.

If a pound a grind is the price we must pay,
The answer is this, with ourselves we must play,
To quench our frustration we now have to w**k,
And for the state of the country we've got Labour to thank.