Carradale

[bubbly jock]

A hunner yards! I can smell scouders from a hunder metres and I don't think Hill sixty would be my problem bochan, after getting past pearly and bobby's I think the next obstacle would be kilbrannan. Lot of poverty there since the atkins diet took hold of the market. Scouders would be as welcome down your neck as baker at an atkins convention.

No, I believe my biggest worry would be the Omens. That lot were reared on Machrihanish coal and Mcnairs dross & stones, swallowed doon with red deisel.

An auld cock like me would be no problem to them.

If the worst came to the worst and I got done in near the peir, Rachael could stuff pillows for the hospital with my feathers and if she couldn't use them for that she could give them to some of the weans in carradale with no fethers.

bubbly

[mornish]

so that explains the oman complection, a suttle shade of machrihanish coal.

shame that place is shut a fortune could be made selling the shade to popstars who have gotten a bit white, or maybe a good rub doon wi a scouders the answer for them.

here am startin to sound like a carradrollian

[LO]

Well now, Bubbly and Mornish! Two wee partners in grime...

If you're going to insult the family name you should get the spelling right . All I can say is that you're lucky I've got thick skin (probably because of the coal dust) and am not usually as litigious as some of my more illustrious relations.


Any more of that nonsense and as an old friend used to say "I'll put the Curse of the Stoat on ye!" (And believe me you don't want that)

A plague of scouders on the pair of ye.

Les Oman

[bubbly jock]

Oh aye LO. Litgation is it? Huh wait 'till the stoats read what you are saying about them.

I would rather be a slant than a dooker and I would certainly rather be a stoat that a slant.

May your armpits be infested with a thousand fleas off one of the stoats doags

[LO]

[quote="bubbly jock"]

I would rather be a slant than a dooker and I would certainly rather be a stoat that a slant.

No argument with the first bit Bubbly, but I find the second part of your sentence fowl

Awa' and march to the midden

Les

[Jeanette]

Talking of marching L.O Better stand by the ramparts I hear the campbells are on the march and have passed wee sheena mcallistairs and heading your way. Or are you in the town today. Don't go near the meadows if you are.

Hold that result I hear they've stopped in at cheryls in saddell for a bite of lunch so I don't suppose they'll get much further today!!

[Jeanette]

I couldn't rsist that davie after you thinking I am who you thought I was
No offence

[bubbly jock]

Jeanette,

I hear what u say in the pm but you leave these bochans and LO to me they're deadly cunning and need a firm hand and they are more my neck of the woods than yours. I'll have them on the run soon

bubbly

[Sanyanya]

That's it Bubbly, fire into those Bochans with a good few pecks on the shooder. Send them back under the bridge at Allt na Beiste, where they came from in the first place.

Your just the boy for them. Give them the old three claw shuffle. Jeest let them know that you'll naw be 'Plucked' at the back of the 'Henhouse', or the Stroolag for that matter.

Don't you worry about the coal dust either, it'll wash off when you want to show the true colours of your plumes.

[Bochan Mor]

Some free-running Saxa salt on your tail feathers will sort you out Bubbly Jock. Once I start pouring you'll not stop scurrying until your well past Whitestone and back into your home 20. By jove you certainly know your way around Trumpton though, almost door to door. You must have been a Postman in your previous life! Manys a postman went on to become a bard in their own right.

Why though are you going to such lengths to avoid the Shore Road. I thought that you would have been quite at home scratching amongst the seaweed and shell at Port na Cuile.

Mornish was right though. There's nothing wrong with him that a good rub down with a scouder wouldn't cure. Sanyanya had better watch his step as well, as he might waken up sleeping beneath the stars. Here, I nearly forgot; he already is!

[LO]

[quote="Jeanette"]Talking of marching L.O Better stand by the ramparts I hear the campbells are on the march and have passed wee sheena mcallistairs and heading your way.

Now Jeanette, my granny was a Campbell from Waterfoot so I've got dual citizenship. I've just been to the baker's and bought seven buns and eleven cookies so if the boys turn up we're sorted!

[LO]

Jeanette,

I hear what u say in the pm but you leave these bochans and LO to me they're deadly cunning and need a firm hand and they are more my neck of the woods than yours. I'll have them on the run soon

bubbly

Aye bubbly, you don't know just how cunning

Just remember the words of the old song:

"We stalked them through the trees at night just like furtive phantoms
Me and my pal Bochan Mor were hunting down the bantams
We bumped them off in twos and threes for the best part of a week
All that remained were bones and feathers and sometimes the odd beak"

[mornish]

here lo you better go an see barrs to get new specs i can spell oman.
or maybe its just the coal dust in your eyes
but i didn't know your branch of the tree was that shady?

[Bochan Mor]

Aye Right enough, we would sing:

"We stalked them through the trees at night just like furtive phantoms
Me and my pal Bochan Mor were hunting down the bantams
We bumped them off in twos and threes for the best part of a week
All that remained were bones and feathers and sometimes the odd beak"

''The nights were long, as we joined the throng, in search of the elusive capon.
He sprachled up Airds Wid, in the belief that this would save him.
The Minister of Walks, set off wae rocks, and a length of string to snare him
Doon they came, and boy was he tame, as they led him off to bake him!''

[LO]

here lo you better go an see barrs to get new specs i can spell oman.
or maybe its just the coal dust in your eyes
but i didn't know your branch of the tree was that shady?

Fair enough mornish Unfortunately we're genetically programmed not to apologise for anything so that's as close as you'll get to one. As you pointed out I must have been coal blind or maybe it was feather-rage?

Re: the other thing, I guess every family has its darker side......