Carradale

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Re: Carradale

Postby Bochan Mor » Wed Oct 09, 2013 8:09 am

Ach Bitter End, you were just not trying hard enough to hear the stramash, you should have set your alarm clock and crossed the stepping stones and walked a mile to the East and homed in on the flickering embers. It was there for all to see and hear, worse than the goat slaughterers of the 1970s, with a combination of horses heads and mare's tail wigs, dancing and hugging with aggression.

The poor laird obviously wasn't able to sleep with his windows open and he was maybe very angry that the sales particulars for Tumbledoon had only mentioned the Tartan Lads and Lasses, the Landrover Rogering and the Beachcombers. It all seemed Tickety Boo on the face of it, but it turned out that they were all just extras in the show and the Mains stars were a bevy of Bochans who like to party at least three or four times a year and sometimes within eye sight and earshot of his beloved machir, weather permitting of course. What a nightmare for the soul, it's even been suggested that they are frightening prehistoric Jeans out the burn!
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Re: Carradale

Postby Ticketty Boo! » Wed Oct 09, 2013 8:35 pm

I'd forgot all about the goat slaughterers. I was only a kid at the time but rumours ranged from trophy hunting American servicemen from Machrihanish - to satanic worship - and worse! Was it ever known what actually happened?
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Re: Carradale

Postby witchnettle » Thu Oct 31, 2013 10:24 pm

I love the fact that the mention of the "goat slaughterers" subject, has brought this whole thread to a grinding halt.

I remember in a very rural pub in Ireland where me and my American friend had been having a good "craic" with the locals, and the minute I asked why the pub was called the "Red Trout", the whole room went silent and we got very cold scary stares from everyone. It was then that he decided it was time to head back to the most disgusting bed and breakfast I have ever stayed in, all in all a strange old experience.
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Re: Carradale

Postby petewick » Mon Nov 04, 2013 3:33 pm

Just remember hearing that some goats were washed up on the bay, shot and headless...........
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Re: Carradale

Postby Ticketty Boo! » Tue Dec 31, 2013 10:48 pm

Very best wishes to all in and around Trumpton for 2014. :D
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Re: Carradale

Postby Right Pongal » Thu May 08, 2014 10:03 am

Deary, Deary me, was that not just nearly the kiss of death to this thread? The mere mention of the cloven hoofed beasts, followed by a blessing on Hogmanay in quick succession, was enough to scatter the shoals at the back of the Sloak to the Girvan Banks! Even Mornish has been keeping clear of the place until now, as the relative safety of the solstice approaches.

The hangovers are just kicking in as the New Year celebrations come to an end, but at least the summer is nigh and there is every chance that the holes in the hedges will grow over, ready to hide a few more half bottles for another siege like this.

Soon be time to get the jet-skis wiped down with a Jizer soaked rag and try out this new slip at the quay. Sanyanya was saying it will be a boon for him. He's going to resurrect an old punt and round up some travellers to go gathering whelks on Arran, then leave the fruits of their labour steeping at the edge of the slip for freshness and optimal market conditions. He was talking about green miles and rather than send them all the way to Glasgow on a steamer or lorry, sell them direct to unsuspecting yachties. I thought the Green Room might be interested as well, as they could serve them up with scrambled egg and a cup of freshly brewed tea.

Not much sign of Snoddy of late, but I think his mind is becoming foggy these days. He was talking as if he was Dr Who, said he feels like a time traveller these days. The place is the same, but seems to be full of different people!
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Re: Carradale

Postby morenish » Fri May 09, 2014 2:15 pm

Well now, it may just be safe to start posting again, but mentions of beasts MEATing an untimely end was frankly scary stuff, worse even than seeing a bochans bald pate glinting in the moonlight between the showers!
I notice that he has pushed pongal into posting first, like an antarctic penguin pushing his pal into the water to see if there are sea lions lurking beneath the dark waters.
ach their are dangers everywhere, even the quays not safe these days as the new slip, a good name for it, seems to have slipped away from where it might do good and ended up on the shore, or so the plans (shaky lines on a picture, in the community notice board) have shown, mind you it will be easier for the preferred builders to reach it there, none of this wading out into the dangerous waters, does anybody know if the funds will stretch to double glazing?
wood or plastic?
At least they'll be built in Argyll, by men from Argyll, for Argyll!

not sure if the same company can help with hedges, and the committee at the harbour seem to be as good at building bridges as the man that did the drawings ........oh maybe it was the one that won first prize in a nursery school competition?
.........Just spoken to Val, she says it wisny the kids that did it.
I'm surprised Sanyanyas looking to the wilks at this time of year, there's no R in the month now till September, and I doubt the Green room would condone selling stuff out of season, even to yachties
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Re: Carradale

Postby Bochan Mor » Fri May 09, 2014 8:51 pm

Not even the sea lions are safe Morenish, the orcas will deal with them, but the last time I heard of an airing of Free Willy was when Sanyanya had to go to Snoddy with a jammed fly on his trousers. Wild squealing and multiple pairs of rubber gloves and Vaseline squared him up and worked fine for Sanyana too.

I remember as a boy learning to tie a 'Slip Knot', but a 'Slip Not' is a new one on me. If all the reports are correct, but then you wouldn't know who to believe, its to be built out of old garden slaps, with a scratch coat and a lick of Barra Shell for grip. Sanyanya will need to watch he doesn't tear his whelk sacks dragging them across a surface like this. At the moment it looks like the cost of the ground works are still higher than cost of the 'Expertise' that has been hired in to ensure a proper job. Here's hoping that there is no need for an extra set of wax crayons for the master mariners on the committee as this could just about tip the balance.

Talking of Sanyanya, I hear he came upon a small pile of dress maker's pins below the Bungalow tea room, with remnants of paper Lifeboat flags attached. He's decided to erect an honesty box and allow his whelk customers the chance of eating on the hoof and returning the pins later in the day for sanitising. As for the 'R' in the month, that's the beauty of stock-piling them alongside the slip, he reckons there would easily be room for at least 50 bags.
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Re: Carradale

Postby morenish » Sun May 11, 2014 2:13 pm

och yer there Bochan, I thought you might be lurking in the background right enough waiting to see if it's safe to launch the mexican Dave for another warm summers cruising or carousing or whatever, but how on earth are you going to get her in the water if there's a new slip and 50 bags of wilks at the side of it?
where's the water going to go if theirs no room for it in the harbour?
maybe if you fitted a skirt( like the Euro song winner) and turned her into a hoovercraft you might just get across the Barra shell, but mind an leave it narrow enough to get between the hingin baskets and other statues an monuments.

Sanyanya 'll no be popular up at the Greenroom then, I hear that nippy wee yin up there was hopin to sell them poor tourists soup an scones and heavy stuff and sick bags before they embarked on Sanyanyas boat.

see how rumours get about in the Dale I heard it was a feeshun accident that poor Sanyanya was tying his own salmon flies and a hook called a "blue Dose" (Tied by W.Hrinko 1914) got caught in him somewhere an Snoddy made a wilt bad job oh gettin it oot.

Now I heard that the new slip was to be clad in garden slabs right enough, the preferred contractor is a dab hand at them apparently, them and bricks, why nobody thought to use these types of materials before is beyond me, good job there's great marine brains on the committee, as a fermer I think boats should be kept in cubicles built along the side o the harbour, but I hear some folk keep them in old Byres and sheep sheds.
It's a pity there wisny some clay doon there, brilliant stuff for makin silage pit walls an perfect for layin slabs wi a wee bit sand to keep them level.
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Re: Carradale

Postby Sanyanya » Wed May 14, 2014 10:11 pm

How the devil did you find out about the fly that got caught in my fly? Snoddy is anything but a dab hand with a forceps and scissors!

Tell the 'Wee Nippy Yin' that all is not lost: After the tourists have scoffed the whelks in June, July & August, they will still need the sick bags followed up by a sizeable measure of the 'Heavy Stuff' to keep the rest down.

Back to the barbed hooks and lures, I notice that 'Wee Nipper' had a splendid night in the Village Hall on Thursday, with record sales of lemon and lime wedges. My goodness, I've never seen so many soor pusses in one room. It was a great idea for using up the excess citrus fruit before the fresh delivery. I was thinking of following up next time with a tin of syrup and plastic spoons as the antidote. The question on my mind however is, how many will willingly take the spoon?

They're telling me that the Ex-CHUGGERS were planning to put their own stamp on the proposed slip and turn it to run ashore instead of out to sea, with low melting point chocolate as the building material of choice, Surely not true?
Strip the Willow was a trade long before the devil turned it into a dance!

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Re: Carradale

Postby morenish » Fri May 23, 2014 2:15 pm

I don't think so Sanyanya, the low melting point chocolate has all been used on the road North according to the courier, but then they must be using old news as I drove over perfect motorway tar (as opposed to the letter writing dooker variety?)

anyway I suppose the slip will all be down to money in the end, and it'll depend on how much the chancellor of the ex-chugger cons out of various sources, I hear one of them has withdrawn after they found out it was going to be a dry slip.
I suppose wee nippy could be persuaded to donate some heavy stuff or even a dry scone as building material.
I would say ther'll be no end of soor pusses take your spoon, only common sense would stop them!
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Re: Carradale

Postby Ticketty Boo! » Tue Aug 12, 2014 6:50 pm

No hauf went affy quiet in here of late? have the scouders got yer tongues?
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Re: Carradale

Postby Ticketty Boo! » Fri Dec 12, 2014 9:11 pm

Affy affy affy quiet - an the goat as near deed as can be tae.
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Re: Carradale

Postby LANDROVER ROGER » Fri Dec 12, 2014 10:26 pm

Are The Bochan still creating mischief? Anything mysterious afoot?
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Re: Carradale

Postby Bochan Mor » Tue Dec 23, 2014 12:13 pm

Naw!
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